The Elephant In The Room

There are some things that need to be said....admitted about myself. Many of you may already know these things about me just by observation or that you know me well. However, there are some that may not. The things I need to admit...confess...inform are not bad things....just things that I struggle with but also enjoy! Are you ready???

I HAVE A PASSION FOR FASHION!!

There I said it! I am feeling a little stupid right now because most of you are thinking "What is the big deal?". The deal is that I have come to accept this about myself and I'm just now starting to enjoy this about myself. I know that this doesn't make any sense so let me start at the beginning!!

Growing up my family was middle class. We had what we needed, some extras but there wasn't a lot of money to spare. I have an older sister and I got a lot of her hand-me-downs growing up. There is nothing wrong with wearing used clothes....I have been known to shop thrift stores a lot. The problem was that my sister is 3 inches shorter than I am and she has a different body shape than I do. Back in the day I was tall and skinny.....I know hard to believe!!! LOL I was all legs and very little shape. SO my sister's clothes didn't exactly fit me. I was a pretty hard fit back then.....we didn't have "long" size jeans or pants....SO if I fit my waist....the pants were over my ankle.....if I fit my leg length....I needed suspenders to hold them up. It was very frustrating for me as a teenager trying to look good!! During this time, I promised myself that one of these days when I was able I would make sure I had nice clothes that fit properly.

About this time, my mom began teaching me to sew. I soon discovered that this was the answer to my clothes fitting problem. In high school I began to make a lot of my clothes and I LOVED IT!! I could make things fit in the waist and add length if needed. Thus my love for sewing began!! So very thankful to my mom for passing on this talent!!

Over the years I fell in love with material....at one point I could have opened a fabric store with all the fabric I had. I sewed all of my own clothes and my daughter's clothes and I did make some things for my son. At one point I sewed for the public. I probably could have been on a sewing hoarders show it was that bad....stashed everywhere!! LOL

Anyway, I still love fabric, texture, patterns, color combinations and the like. I don't sew as much but I do love clothes and all the things that go with dressing, shoes, purses, belts, jewelry....you get the picture.  

Confession: I have two walk-in closets with my clothes and shoes in them right now as I type. I know....a little much!! This is where the struggle comes in. Yes my passion for fashion is a struggle just like someone struggling with addition of any kind. I constantly struggle with wanting just one more top to go with those certain pants or that pair of shoes that are on sale that will look great with my new dress. This is a real struggle for me. I have placed people in my life that hold me accountable for this and check in with me regularly to see how I am doing. You may be laughing but there are times when these people have kept me sane and in-check.

Getting back to my passion for fashion....I have learned a lot over the years about fashion, styles, what colors look good on me and what doesn't. It has been a journey....a fun journey. When I found myself single after 27 years of marriage I was lost and had no idea who I was and what I was about. I had spent 27 years trying to make someone else happy and had no idea how to make myself happy. A very special God sent counselor has helped me over the years!!!

That was 8+ years ago and since that time I have learned several things about myself:

• God loves ME and He died on the cross for ME and My sins.
• I am worthy of His love.
• I have more blessings than I can count.
• My passion for fashion is okay as long as I keep it in control.
• I have learned to love myself with my big mouth, my red hair (yes it was originally red LOL) and my long legs.
• I am made in the image of God and there is nothing wrong with the way I look.
• I have learned how to dress myself to flatter this crazy body God has given me.

These are just few things that counseling has helped me to accept and God has shown me though His word. My journey over the last eight years hasn't been easy in fact it was down right painful at times. God has shown me that being in love with clothes and fashion is not wrong as long as it doesn't take the place of Him in my life. He has shown me that looking good, feeling good in my own skin is not a bad thing, in fact I have learned that when I feel good with what I have on and the way I look, I am more productive and have a better attitude for the day. I have a hard time cleaning my house in my PJ's....I feel like I just need to go back to bed!


I know that there are some that will or have perhaps judged me because of how I dress or because of having written this post. I can't do anything about your thoughts or opinions....everyone is entitled to them....I just want to let people know that I don't dress the way I do to make a showing or to present myself as being better than anyone else. I said these things more for myself as a way of exposing a weakness of myself....confession is good for the soul....right??

I have said all these things, not to draw attention to myself but to help you perhaps understand me better. I also have said these things for myself. I need to be reminded daily that God is my passion not clothes. By being in God's word daily, I stay focused on Him and not on the latest dress style, etc.

Thanks for reading!


From my corner of the world....looking good and focusing on God!!

2013

HAPPY NEW YEAR!!! The older I get the faster the years go by!! WOW! Ken and I stayed home last night and were in bed by 10.....I know boring right?? We NEVER stay up late.....just can't do it!! Honestly, I need all the beauty sleep I can get!! LOL

2013 had it's up and downs. We dealt with Ken being sick twice, with the doctor's not knowing what was wrong with him. Talk about scary.....spent a lot of time on my knees pleading for God to give doctor's answers, treatment plans but most of all pleading for God to restore Ken's health. Praises to the Lord, He did just that!!!!. Ken still struggles with some lingering weakness but overall he is feeling well. 

Ken and I survived a total remodel on our house, and yes we are still married and going strong!! It was extremely stressful with people in and out of our house, decisions having to be made....some on the spot. We are very please with the results and feel blessed with a "new" house. We have already had several people over to show it off. Our prayer is that the Lord will use our home to make others feel His love as we open our doors in 2014.

 

We had a new grandson born in 2013....Luke Wyatt came 3 weeks early in July instead of August. He is perfect in every way....just wanted to see his Granny!!! LOL Addi was very excited to bring Luke home from the "post office" (she firmly believes that Tara and David picked up Luke at the post office, even after seeing Tara in the hospital!!!). She is one very proud big sister!

 

Ken and I were blessed to take a trip up north in September. We visited Yellowstone National Park, Glacier National Park, Devils Tower, and lots of side stops along the way! I had never been to any of those places and Ken really enjoyed showing me the sights. We stood in awe at some of God's most beautiful work!!

Before we left I got to see Cooper and Kamryn ride in the West Texas Fair and Rodeo Parade. This was a huge event for Kamryn because she got to ride her horse all by herself!!! She did great and was the prettiest cowgirl in the parade!!! 

Cooper participated in his first "muttin bustin" competition. I am very proud to say...."HE WON FIRST PLACE!!!"......we were on our trip at the time and let me tell you when I got the call that he had won first place there was not stopping this Granny from screaming and shouting!!!!! Ken and I nearly got kicked out of the park!!!! LOL

Through the ups and downs of 2013, Ken and I have tried hard to count our blessings. It wasn't always easy but we had each other to lean on and tried to keep each other looking up. God has seen us through another year and for that we are thankful.

I hope and pray that 2014 will be as good if not better than 2013....but whatever God brings us to.....God will see us through it!!

From my corner of the world.....keeping my eyes on the Lord!